You're Late

Dear Audrey,
You are late. Today I am 10 months and 2 days pregnant with you. I'm not sure why everything we have been told tells us that pregnancy only lasts 9 months; that is a big fat lie. 40 weeks adds up to 10 months, not 9! I am increasingly sore and tired and am more than ready to be done being pregnant, but you don't seem to mind staying put. I am sure you are more than comfortable and will come when you damn please. I hate to burst your bubble (not really), but if you don't come out on your own by Friday, you are going to be forced out! I know you don't mean to be causing me pain, although I keep having this nagging suspicion that you actually enjoy it (already!), but I know you're just doing what you were made to do: survive and thrive. I just wish you would decide to survive and thrive outside of my womb!

Mike is feeling increasingly sorry for me because of how much pain I am in. Neither of us are sleeping much at all these days. I am uncomfortable no matter what side I lay on, and I can only stand an hour or so on either side before I have to switch sides, I also have to get up to pee every time I switch sides, and I am hot and then cold and then hot again, so I am throwing blankets off and then pulling them back on all night as well. This makes it hard, to say the least, for Mike to sleep. I kind of feel bad for him, but then again, not really since this is the only discomfort he has had to experience throughout the entire pregnancy, while I have been in hell. We keep talking to Audrey and telling her that she needs to come out, but no luck. I guess it's just a waiting game at this point. It's a pretty annoying game really. Anyways, we are more than ready for her. The car seat is in the car, the hospital bag is packed, all of her clothes are washed, we have everything we need for her. There's really nothing left to be done, which makes this waiting game even more boring and annoying. I sewed my own nursing cover last week, which I felt I was putting off until way too late, but I guess not. I could always sew some more bibs, but it hurts to bend over the sewing machine and honestly I am just way too sore to do much of anything. So I am left to sitting around with heating pads on my SI joint and back and reading or watching movies. I was a little worried about not having enough time to finish all my pregnancy and baby books, but apparently I had more than enough time to finish those as well.

I continue to have really strange dreams. Last night I had two dreams where I had given birth to Audrey. In the first one she was very stiff like a doll which made it really hard to breastfeed her after she was born, and none of the nurses or lactation consultants would help me. In the other one I had given birth to Audrey, but Audrey was a boy and as if that's not bad enough, he was black! I wonder if this is my mind spinning Nip Tuck into my dreams. I was so upset because I had not cheated on Mike and could not make sense of how our baby turned out to be black and because the ultrasound technician had assured us that we were having a girl. Anyways, Mike stuck around, but we had nothing to dress him in and had to put him in girls clothes. I think every woman is a little worried about whether their baby will be a girl or boy regardless of what the ultrasound technician has told them. We have had three ultrasounds with three different ultrasound technicians since the sex could be determined, so I am pretty sure that they can't all be wrong about Audrey being a girl. I just guess there's still that fear somewhere inside of me; not that I would mind if we were having a boy instead of a girl, it's just that we have everything set up for a girl, so Audrey better indeed be a girl!

Anyways, we are as ready as we are ever going to be Audrey, so please come out soon! We love you and can't wait to meet you.